I originally wrote this about 15 years ago, before I even bothered with a website. But as the pubs will be open again soon, it need reiterating.
Before making the call, you need to prepare yourself for the questions you are going to be asked. It is vitally important that you know the following pieces of information:
- Where are you? – Either the address or name of where you are.
- Where are you going? – If you don’t know, we can’t take you there.
- How many people? – This is really important, as you can’t fit 17 people into a Ford focus.
- What is your name? – If you have to ask someone, it is probably time to go home.
Making the call
Once you have all the information required, there is one last thing to check before you make the call. Can you be heard?
It is all well and good knowing that 7 people want to go from the Brown Trumpet to the Pink Oboe in the name of Lucas, but if you can’t convey this information over the phone then you are screwed.
Good places to call from are:
Pub toilets or porches, beer gardens, anywhere that you can hold a conversation without shouting.
Bad places are:
At the bar on a busy night, 27cm from the main speaker stack at Knebworth when Motorhead are on, Cannock, a train, within earshot of your pissed mate murdering some piss-awful song on karaoke, next to a 747 spooling up for take off, a building site.
Don’t be surly. Really, we’re just trying to do a job. We’re trying to get as many people moved, and thus take as much money as possible. Getting arsey with us really won’t help.